Stephen Hancocks reflects on the festive season.
Memories are short. Well, some memories are short. What was I going to write? Oh yes. Just one year ago we were still in a pandemic state of mind. I know we are not entirely out of the woods yet but at least there is no media frenzy as to whether or not Christmas will be cancelled; as was prevailing 12 months ago.
So, I feel able to resume my tradition of suggesting a festive gift for the dentist who has everything. Doesn’t every dentist have everything? This year I am going to start with an inversion – what not to buy. Somewhat distressingly I see that the author, comedian and actor David Walliams (in the headlines for another reason entirely) has penned a children’s play called Demon Dentist.
The plot apparently involves strange items being left under pillows by the tooth fairy in exchange for baby teethand two investigative protagonists eventually coming face-to-face with “the demon dentist herself”. Hmm, just what we need, thanks David. Maybe then some tickets under the tree for a night out at the theatre – but not that one.
Cross purposes
From time to time the world throws up some unintended clashes that provide a smirk, at least for those who are in on the joke. Take, for example a new product, the naming of which could not possibly have occurred to the makers as a red rag to the dental profession: uda coffee!
I have no conflict of interest here and haven’t tried the beverage but the description in the press release, when applied to the ‘other uda’ does read rather ironically. “The first longevity-focused consumer brand clinically proven to extend our lifespans” and “it seems as if the business of anti-ageing is booming. Yet, there have been no credible products which target ageing at its core - this is where uda steps in, by providing an easy and habitual way to increase our wellbeing for longer.” Will you tell them or shall I?
Yuletide beckons
Having to write this column in the month before the cover date of the issue, it was in July that I recall thinking ahead that August Bank Holiday is always the start of the slippery slope towards Christmas.
It is ever thus, but always seems ridiculous. Yet it’s true. Where did those previous five months go? How come we always scoff but then scrabble for Christmas cards in the first week of December the same as everyone else? History has the last laugh and I, the last bite. Despite the pre-yule stampede, the team at The Dentist has brought you this and every issue in 2022 on time and in full, and are continually grateful for your continued positive feedback and support. They join me in completing this last corner of the last page of the last issue of the year by wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and a healthy, happy and prosperous 2023!