The last bite

How does your dog smell?

I was reminded recently of the dreadful old Music Hall joke which goes something along the lines of ‘how does your dog smell?’ Answer: ‘awful’. The prompt was a survey by a waste disposal company which reported on the nation’s 10 worst smells, one of which was wet dogs.

As might be expected, bad breath was near the top of the list, as were the smell of babies’ nappies, rotting food and sewers on a hot day. Various other slightly unmentionable niffs associated with the human condition were also listed as the top nose-peggers but there were also some unexpected responses. One person apparently cited fresh breath as an unpleasant odour (perhaps they misunderstood the question) whilst others complained about cut flowers (!), hairdressers’ shops, newspapers and maybe not so surprisingly Brut 33 aftershave.

A follow-up survey among dentists might come up with an interesting list of the profession’s least favourite pongs including root canal infections, stale curry and patients with less than fastidious general hygiene…but probably not good old copal varnish (sniff).